Test Your Friends

Amir Vehabovic, a man in Bosnia, staged his own funeral as a hoax. When only his mother attended, this is the letter he sent to his friends. Courtesy of Harper's.

To all my dear "friends,"
Some of you I have known since early school
days, others I have only forged a relationship with
in the last few years. Until my "funeral," I considered
all of you close friends. So it was with
shock and, I admit, sadness and anger that I realized
not one of you managed to find the time to
come and say goodbye to me when you heard I was
to be buried. I would have understood if just some
of you came, bearing flowers or words of apology
from others who could not make it. But no. Not
a single one of you turned up to pay your last respects.
I lived for our friendships. They meant as
much to me as life itself. But how easy it was for
you all to forget the pledges of undying friendship
I heard on so many occasions. How different our
ideas of friendship seem to be. I paid a lot of money
to get a fake death certificate and to bribe undertakers
to deliver an empty coffin. I thought
my funeral would be a good joke-the kind of
prank we have all played on one another over
the years. Now I have just one last message for you:
My "funeral" might have been staged, but you
might as well consider me dead, because I will
not be seeing any of you again.